loss of life

the dead will remain numbers, though countless

I let several days slip by as I was mulling over in my head exactly what I wanted to post on this first divine adventure of a blog. In the meantime, the worst natural disaster of my life occurred, with reports tonight of nearly 70,000 confirmed dead in the initial wave/wake of the now infamous Sumatra tsunami. Let me say that despite spending much time thinking about the issue, I still don't feel like I have thought about it enough. I cannot grasp the loss of 70,000 lives. I don't really do all that well with one, and even numbers like 17 or 24, perhaps in reference to Iraq casualties of any given day, start to seem like nothing more than numbers to me. There is nothing I can say that is profound or enlightening or even worthwhile on the subject- events of this magnitude defy the traditional kitschy blurb fired off about current events.
I realize that I must stare my own physical mortality in the face. The people I see on television news reports, mostly men, are reduced to tears at the total loss of family, home, livelihood. The survivors are mostly men because they had the physical strength or stamina to outrun or hold onto something solid long enough to survive. Women and children did not. Ruthless, prejudiced mother nature--discriminating and uncaring, but leaving no one completely alone; the men still weep on rolling, international cameras. Their weeping may never cease. These men could be my father, my brother, myself, should we bend the borders of humanity through skin color and even gender. Dare I say it? September 11th pales in comparison. These are not our fellow Americans, these are our fellow people-a common bond I feel more deeply than fanatacized patriotism.
We plan to step in and help with several million dollars. I say several, because the figure keeps changing; and that's not my point, at least not in this blog. The loss of life still has me by the throat with its withered, brown hand, keeping me from moving on to anything else. This is not a political situation. It is a humanitarian situation; but nothing can keep the latter arena from moving into the former. My greatest concern is, what can the earth sustain? What can humanity sustain? Sure, we are not talking about billions or even millions here, but it sure rattles the chains of the chickenwire safety cage.
I am praying tonight, for the people of Indonesia, Thailand, Malaysia, Sri Lanka, India, the Maldives, Somalia, Bangladesh, Myanmar, Seychelles, Tanzania, and Kenya. I am praying for the world, that whatever comes next, we will do all that we can. I am praying for myself, that the withered hands will let go of my throat; that the flesh will be restored, at least in my dreams, and I can understand tragedy on a global scale.